COUPONS!!!

I post this summary everywhere.  Anytime someone asks me about coupons I refer them to following websites:

I love coupons.  If you know me well, you are aware of my obsession.  (I have been slacking lately, but hope to get back in the swing of things come winter, especially on my pregnancy leave when I will be sitting at home bored before the babies come.) The thing is I am SMALL POTATOES compared to some couponers. Even in Canada, where our coupons aren’t typically as high valued or as frequent as the Americans, some Canadian couponers are scoring some really kick ass deals. Mine are small in comparison. Honestly, couponing is a high for me, when I score an amazing deal or free shit THAT I USE I float through the rest of my day (I am easily pleased). If I ever score absurd amounts of stuff, I hope I can donate it. 

Visit: MrsJanuary.com (my Canadian couponing guru) for all the couponing how to! It’s helpful to follow her on Facebook as well so you can see if there are special coupons posted throughout the day. She has a coupon database as well where she has posted all the links to coupons, including printable coupons.  Every Thursday, she posts “Coupon Match Ups” that matches coupons to sales in flyers, she does the work for you!

***Canadian Sites that mail coupons to you:

Brandsaver.ca
Save.ca
GoCoupons.ca
Websaver.ca

Sign up!!!

*****Store Policies to know: (There are likely more stores then the following, it’s just these are the ones I frequent)

***Accept Printed Coupons:
Walmart, Shoppers Drug, Zellers, Zehrs, No Frills

***Stores who Price Match (PM): <Have to bring a current competitors’ flyer>
Walmart, Zellers, Canadian Tire
(Canadian Tire not only Price Matches but gives you 10% of the difference in Canadian Tire money, it’s written on their buggy returns in the parking lot, I assume in the store as well, but I know it’s on the buggy returns for sure)

*****“Scanning Code of Practice”:
It is against the law for a store to put a sticker or a price on an item and then charge more for it at the till. You as the consumer HAVE to be AWARE of this.

Some stores Participate in the “Scanning Code of Practice” which helps the stores insure that they are giving you the most honest/best service possible. Each store has a slight variation to the name of the practice, but if you get the words “scan, code, practice”, you should be good.

Scanning Code of Practice is as follows:

If an item is $10 or MORE and scans incorrectly, you are to receive $10 OFF the FIRST item. If you have more then one of the same item, you get $10 off the first one and then the remaining are changed to the correct price.

If an item is $10 or LESS and scans incorrectly, you are to receive the FIRST item FREE, yes, FREE. If you have more then one of the same item, you get the first item FREE and the remaining are changed to the correct price.

YOU HAVE TO TELL/REMIND THE CLERK. They will just change the price to the correct price, YOU HAVE TO REMIND them. I like the “Oh, doesn’t this store abide by the Scanning Code of Practice?” If they don’t give it to you, ask politely to speak to the manager. Be POLITE but FIRM!!!

***Stores who practice “Scanning Code of Practice”:

Walmart, Zehrs, No Frills, Canadian Tire
(Walmart has it written on the platform where you are to sign your credit card slip, BESIDE the debit terminal at each cash register.)
(Zehrs has a humongous sign on the wall over the cashier’s heads.)

DO NOT PAY MORE; the stores established these practices in order to give you the best service possible: LEARN IT AND USE IT!!!

Current List of Pet Peeves

This morning marks my first day off on sick leave/pregnancy leave/parental leave.  I am sitting in bed on “light bed rest”, my sore hips and interrupted sleep has me a smidgen grumpy today.  Wallowing in my grumpiness, I started thinking about my pet peeves, and it seemed to irritate me more.  Then I figured I should shake that grumpiness, and the best way I thought was to write out my pet peeves as writing is cathartic.  Take a gander and see if you make it on my annoying list, lol.

1.        Happy Hump day!  I am not referring to the camel.  I actually laugh at the camel on the commercial.  I had a particularly annoying person in my life who felt the need to wish me a Happy Hump Day every Wednesday.  Long before the camel.  As this person is annoying in general, to know to anticipate a “Happy Hump Day” encounter every Wednesday would drive me nuts. 

2.       Being called “Kiddo” by someone seven years older than me.  Especially when I said to them, stop calling me kiddo.  So I started referring to this individual as “old bag” to their face.  This surprisingly didn’t stop them from calling me “kiddo” it did however make me feel a lot better.  (I never said I was mature.)

3.       Canadians who are excited to turn 21.  WTF, we aren’t American.  You can vote at 18 and drink at 19.  Turning 21 here is no big deal.

4.       When a person says “oh she’s ethnic.” Like it’s a bad thing.  Everyone has an ethnic background, pick up a dictionary you ignoramus. 

5.       People who shorten words.  (People's names are ok.)  When I was in high school, there was a market across the road from my school called “Harvest Barn” I would hear people call it the “barn” and I would cringe.  It’s one extra word.  The worst was hearing someone say they were going to “Harv”.  Someone in my life refers to my dog as “Miss. M” Say the dog’s name, its five letters you lazy cunt.

6.       When people squeeze the toothpaste from the centre of the tube.  More specifically when they squeeze the centre and from the edges.  Squeeze from the bottom!  Why is it I always end up with a roommate who squeezes from the middle?!?!

7.       If you ask me the same question 15 times.  I don’t mind people asking questions.  I give about three or four attempts.  Maybe you legitimately forgot, or you didn’t hear the first time.  Fair enough.  But 15 times you are just stupid and I should be allowed to hit you in the head with a stapler.

8.       A countdown.  Or I should say, someone who insists on doing a countdown to my event.  I don’t mind doing my own countdown, but having someone message me daily saying “four months and 6 days till you get married!”  Fuck off, I am excited, but this is my event.  I don’t need a daily reminder.  (I already have one in my head.)  This pet peeve probably stems more from the obnoxious individual, however they made me hate countdowns.

9.       Gum snapping.

10.   People who touch my belly.  (Sorry, I was trying to keep is pregnancy free, but this is a huge pet peeve.)  At least ask beforehand.  And if I gave you permission once, that’s not a free pass forever.  And you better be a friend or a family member, not an acquaintance or a stranger.

11.   Sour cream that expires before we even get a chance to open it, or we used one scoop.  Can’t they make that shit with a longer shelf life?

12.   When I am dead tired and my hands think it’s funny to drop supper on the floor.  This happens far more then it should, and no I do not have the pregnant dropsies.  I drop shit all the time, pregnant or non-pregnant.

13.   When acquaintances make assumptions about me.  Just after I got married, I had a friend come to me and said they heard I was trying to get pregnant.  I was like no, our game plan is to be married a few years to each other beforehand, it always was and that’s what we did.  I asked who she heard this from, the person she named I never talk to.  So I was surprised that this person “knew” so much about my personal life.  Lol.  They were dead wrong.  The sad thing was, my friend seemed sad I hadn’t shared this with her.  I hadn’t shared because it wasn’t the plan at all. 

           Funny spin on this pet peeve, years ago an acquaintance of my Dad’s was telling people that my Dad had died (he’s still alive and kicking today!) So my Dad would be out about and old friends and acquaintances were always coming up to him exclaiming “Oh my god, I heard you were dead!”  My Dad thought it was funny, but geez, get your facts right before you start spreading shit.

14.   When someone lines up behind you at the grocery store with one item and looks at your full buggy.  Go get in the express line.  Don’t expect me to let you jump in front of me, especially if I have already been standing here for ten minutes.

15.   Don’t walk up to a grocery line and start huffing and puffing about the length of the line.  I have already been standing here five minutes and I am keeping quiet.  You’re just making me more annoyed and you may get a canned good thrown at your head.

16.  Shit rubs in toilets.  Be courteous and look back in the toilet when you are done, throw an extra handful of toilet paper in and flush again.  No one wants to see that.  Especially in a public rest room you damned pig.  And if you pee on the seat, wipe the pee off.  Women are disgusting in public rest rooms.  Also, if you have a super loose deuce, flush those shit flakes left behind.  No one wants to see those either. 

Other random pregnancy thoughts:

(I apologize for the influx of pregnancy stuff, I have some thrifty ideas coming down the shoot, that I hope to address once I am officially on my pregnancy leave and bored at home.)

• My husband is awesome.  He likes to clothing shop for the babies.  It’s really cute to watch him hold up these itty bitty sweaters and stare thoughtfully at them.  He then turns and asks me what I think.  He loves old classic patterns and textures; tweeds, plaids, argyles; our kids will be mostly dressed like they are heading out for a fox hunt with the residents of Downton Abbey.  He runs to try and help me with stuff; I am quite independent and have had a hard time adjusting to asking people for help, I try to waddle through my day as if I can still physically do the things I could do before.  He’s right there to grab a box or reach for something high, without me having to ask him for help.  (I always say thank you!) It’s like we are a well oiled machine, he just seems to be at the right place at the right time, and keeping a watchful eye on me; it’s pretty darned cute. 

• I keep asking my husband if I haven’t been too hormonal through out this experience.  He always gives me a funny side on look, insinuating that I have been crazy; however I think he does that for comedic effect.  I know I have had like two crying breakdowns, (hey, I am allowed.)  The one day he asked me why I was crying and I was like ugly sobbing “I’m just so tired.”  Lol.  Funny now, not so funny as it was happening.    

• I may have tried to chase down a young couple in Walmart with brand new baby girl twins, however the one baby started crying and the father sped walked away.  (Maybe he knew he had a crazy stalker trying to “casually” approach them.)  I was dying to ask the Mom how she was doing and any advice for parents with brand new twins. 

• File this under “Weird Shit People Say to Me”:  I was telling someone of the good deal I got at Walmart on these little two piece summery outfits, $3 for a pair of shorts and a t-shirt set.  (Good lord, I love the clearance section in the baby department.) And she was quite hoity in “telling” me “You know you have to be careful and not buy babies too much clothing as they just grow out of it.”  Yes, I know they grow out of clothing fast, but I have to buy them something as the babies can’t go naked until they hit their teens.  And I only bought two outfits, and I bought them on clearance, at Walmart.  It’s not like I was buying Baby Gap or something else ridiculously expensive.  $3 is ridiculously good considering even used clothing stores are more money then that. 

• I am in the very uncomfortable stage, it’s hard to breathe sometimes and it’s hard to eat.  I am constantly trying to “rub” the babies down so I can breathe.  But then they sit so low I am walking like I am bull legged. 
• I tried to sit on the floor the other day.  I managed to get down on my butt, but with my momentum and being top heavy, I accidentally rolled all the way back on my back.  It took me a while to roll back up to the seated position.  My husband may have laughed so hard at me that he had to lean against the wall to keep himself standing. I imagine it must have been pretty funny to see. 
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• I am hot all of the time.  The first time in my life I am hot 24/7.  And not horny hot, like temperature hot.  I am so grateful to be heading into Winter.  The poor women who have babies in the summer have my deepest sympathies.  

• I am selfish and can’t wait for the babies to arrive, I want to meet them, and I am tired of feeling like a beached whale.  But, I sort of dread when they come out in the world: Kleenex box projectiles, crazy kidnappers, bullies in school, etc.  I know when they are tucked safely in my gigantic belly, they are safe.  I wish I was like a kangaroo and could shove them back into my pouch when we go places so no one can kidnap them or they can't run out in traffic.  I suppose all Mom’s must feel like that to a degree.

• I have a hard time sometimes with how big I am.  I know that I am pregnant, with two kids.  It’s just the last year and a half I worked hard on losing weight and getting into shape.  The funny thing is I was trying to get into shape to start trying to get pregnant.  It’s just hard sometimes thinking about for a year and a half I watched my waist band shrink and now it keeps growing.  I know, I know, I am pregnant, it’s not like I am just getting fat, there are babies in there. 
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• I have lost my ass.  It's flat as a pancake.  It's like it shifted to my front. 

• Having someone head bang against your colon is the oddest sensation, possibly ever.

• POOP ALERT: Supposedly pregnant women can have constipation throughout their pregnancy.  I have IBS.  This has not been the case for me.  In fact, quite the opposite.  Also, I am taking extra Iron pills as per my doctor’s request, and he warned me it may cause constipation, NOPE.

And back to more positive stuff so people don’t think I am hating this all completely:

• I love when the babies move.  I love when they kick.  Their kicks are getting stronger and they are responding to sounds and noises which is really cool.  The other day I felt the boy jerk when the dog barked.  It’s good for them to hear noises in utero as it apparently gets them used to the sounds when they are born.

• It’s funny when strangers smile at me in the store.  I have been getting this for the last couple of months now, but it still throws me.  I smile back politely thinking “Do I know them?”  (I am really good with faces so this really throws me)  I am now getting better at realizing, they are smiling at my pregnant belly.